The Other Side Of Me

I asked God for a simple life
A life full of surprises amidst difficulties
Would rather struggle than be in a smooth road
Living a difficult life on earth
Means a happier life after death.

Grateful when I am in trouble
Never afraid nor lose hope
This is my chance for a time with Him
Time to talk, time to cry
Time to feel His spirit that engulfs me.

I let God rule my life
Be thankful for all the things, people and events
He brings my way.
To help me choose and decide
What will really make me happy in life.

I am not perfect
Cause I am only human
Yearning for freewill
To feel how it is to love, and be loved
Even get hurt.

I consider hurt
As my cross that will lead me to heaven.
Instead of hatred
I fill my heart only with love
So that I may live a peaceful life.

I Pray for those who belittle me
I Pray for those who judge me
I Pray for those who curse me
And I pray that one day
These people will know the real me.

Those who wish for a simple life
Sometimes wants to be in my world
The world I created for myself
A world no one can understand
Only me and the One who created me.

My Numerology Reading

Well said and read! As if this guy knew me. How nice almost perfectly described WHO I AM and what i have been through. Thank you for the free reading (http://numerologist.com)

Reincarnation yes I believe. I have tried REGRESSION ( knowing my past lives) myself and I found out 3 past lives. I am twice a male and a female... Now again. I know not all people will believe but I do. 

I even experienced ASTRAL PROJECTION (wherein, my spirit get out of my human body). A real "Oh my God! "I  saw my body lying on bed. I was crying and praying. I thought I am dying. "Lord, please my 3 kids still need me." ... and I got back of my senses. In a position exactly as I saw it. Scared but true. I have searched on this and it can really happen.

I guess I should make some stories about this some other time.

Somebody

I love this song which at the corner of my heart sings...

I want somebody to share
Share the rest of my life

Share my innermost thoughts

Know my intimate details

Someone who'll stand by my side

And give me support

And in return

He'll get my support

He will listen to me

When I want to speak

About the world we live in

And life in general

Though my views may be wrong

They may even be perverted

He'll hear me out

And won't easily be converted

To my way of thinking

In fact he'll often disagree

But at the end of it all

He will understand me

And I....

I want somebody who cares

For me passionately

With every thought

With every breath

Someone who'll help me see things

In a different light

All the things I detest

I will almost like

I don't want to be tied

To anyone's strings

I'm carefully trying to steer clear of

Those things

But when I'm asleep

I want somebody

Who will put their arms around me

And kiss me tenderly

Though things like this

Make me sick

In a case like this

I'll get away with it

And in a place like this

I'll get away with it

And I....

I want somebody

The Mirror of My Soul

An eyes seem so teary

That speak the inner side of me.

The mirror of my soul.

Why still flaunts with sadness.

That no amount of laughter can conceal?

Though I find serenity after a long years of agony

 What is there that is missing?

What am I in search for?

Still a long journey to travel...

More challenges to face?

Love more and till it hurts no more?

Or just a need to get out of the shell and be myself?

Face the world and explore to unleash the other side

To complete the true meaning of ME!

For my eyes harmonize with this smile. 

Why A Blog?

Why a late question wherein fact i already have several posts? Still in search of serenity? Funny, but its true. I was supposed to create this blog when I am already starting my new endeavor away from my precious rewards (my wonderful kids who keeps me alive and kicking to fight for my existence).  A variety of feelings I, myself can not explain that causes confusion as to how to make a good start. So much in mind that I can not even organize my thoughts. Life is a display of emotional instability.

I keep my blog site available for me when I feel like writing. I am not a good writer, I know! especially I have to do this in different language that I am not normally using. Such a "nosebleed" as they say, but I should try to help myself. I even asked my Twinnie (my half-sister whom I love so much) to edit my blogs (Life) cause I may sound so confusing to readers who do not know what I was trying to convey.

I am searching  blogs to read yet unable to find a good one that will inspire me. Lately I did and so much joy reading them.  Though I don't want this to be publicized. I have no confidence to do so.  Should I say I hate to be criticized then lose interest in blogging when I get hurt? Too ashamed for people to see too much grammatical errors? Or because I do not want people to know who I am and what I really feel?

So this blog is merely an expression of uncontainable feelings,&thoughts of sadness, happiness, depression, anxiety anger so forth & so on... for a great relief.

Writing what you feel is a good mechanism to feel better - go and write!